Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
