Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
