Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
