is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
