i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
