wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
