found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
