I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
