Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
