i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
