this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
