She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
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