If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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