Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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