Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
