i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
