You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
