did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
