im having a threesome with these popsicles
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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