Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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