Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You are the jesus of drinking
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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