My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
