I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
