just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
