I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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