doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Dick very happy bro
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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