stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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