she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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