You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
