this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
