I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Randomize
