whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize