so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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