i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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