My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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