There is no way he is gay with that hair.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
