office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
