the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
