and you said cock pushups were impossible
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
