: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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