she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize
