There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
