Swine flu. Run for my life!
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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