No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
