I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
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