$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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