are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
