fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
