google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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