3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I could have mohawked her pubes.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
