Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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